


In The Hanged Raven

by CrimsonFirebreeze



Series: The Arcana [9]
Category: The Arcana (Visual Novel)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Female Apprentice (The Arcana), Julian Devorak Route - Reversed Ending, Julian Devorak's Route Spoilers, Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-04
Updated: 2019-11-04
Packaged: 2021-01-23 04:37:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 655
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21314314
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrimsonFirebreeze/pseuds/CrimsonFirebreeze
Summary: Alyce struggles with the thought of Julian's suffering and inside the Hanged Raven, they only have each other to lean on.
Relationships: Apprentice/Julian Devorak
Series: The Arcana [9]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1517558
Kudos: 37





	In The Hanged Raven

**Author's Note:**

> I said I wasn't doing this and I did it. I HATE Julian's reversed ending but i LOVE the design of him. The whole just hurts deep in my soul and apparently writing three other sad plague fics isn't enough. 
> 
> I cried, guys. I really just sobbed over this one and it's a rare day when my own fics hurt me.
> 
> I'm on Tumblr - AmpersandXVII

His feathers were smooth under her fingers, his heavy wing resting across her lap. Julian slept, stirring minimally and breathing deeply. Alyce took it all in, the merged realms, the Hanged Raven and Julian's twisted new form. A tear fell on the obsidian feathers and she choked on her sob. How had they failed? And how did he suffer through this alone? How could she fix it now? Could she make a deal to end his suffering? Would it cost her Julian entirely if she did? Julian stirred, his eyes studying her and she didn't bother to hide that she was crying. 

"Ah. I knew it," he said bitterly, withdrawing his massive wing. "You're unhappy with me. It seems the Devil was right. You don't want me."

"Stop it," she snapped. "It's not that."

"You don't have to lie to me, it's fine. I know what I look like. You don't have to force yourself to stay with this."

"Stop," she screamed, putting her hands over her ears. "Stop talking about yourself like that! Stop saying those awful things! Just stop! STOP!"

She dissolved into hiccuping sobs curling into herself, overwhelmed by everything. Black wings came around her as he settled behind her. His breath was warm on her neck. His talons gently brushed her shoulders, pulling her into him. 

"I'm sorry," he said softly. "Please don't cry, Alyce." 

"I love you," she said. "I don't know how to tell you that any more than I have. I hate the way you put yourself down. I hate the way you doubt me. I hate…. I hate what the Devil has done to you. I don't mean physically, I mean mentally. He's got you all twisted up and sabotaging yourself more than ever and I hate it. I hate that you've suffered and still are." 

Julian shifted, feathers ruffling up. A pout sat on his lips. "I did it for you." 

"And I am grateful. If my heart could burst, it would. I could never hope to be loved so fiercely before you. You gave up everything for me."

"I couldn't stand the thought of something awful happening to you again," he sighed. "I didn't keep you safe before. I had to do it, don't you see?"

"I know. I just wish it didn't cost you so much."

"My soul for yours. It's a small thing." 

"It isn't though," she said touching his face. "It's everything."

"You are everything. To me."

"As you are to me, my sweet." He kissed her softly, holding her tight, wrapped in his wings. She nuzzled into him, sighing, "I just want you to be happy."

"As long as you're in my arms, my darling, I am."

She studied his face, still so enraptured by his beautiful eyes. They had always reminded her of the storm whipped seas of her country, further south than even his native Nevivon. 

"I will find a way to save you," she said.

"Please… please don't. Just stay with me. Be safe with me," he begged. 

"I won't leave you," she promised. "But I will strive for your happiness, Ilya."

"Oh, say it again," he gasped, closing his eyes, almost euphoric. "It's so sweet when you say it."

"Ilya. My Ilya. My sweet, wonderful, beautiful, beloved Ilya." 

He made a delighted little sound, kissing her again and again. She settled back into him, letting him hold her for as long as he liked. She would save him. She may not be able to save the realms but she could try to save him, take back his soul from the Devil, find their friends. It would take a lot of convincing to get him to agree to leave the Hanged Raven but she would work on that later. For now, in this moment, it was enough to be with him, build him up, show him that she loved him unconditionally, and somehow build a future for themselves.


End file.
